One of my highest goals in this life is to stay happily married to the same woman for a lifetime. I honestly believe many couples want to grow old together, but based on statistics the majority won’t make it to the finish line. Every day thousands of marriages that started out with such high hopes end in an ugly divorce. If you care deeply about your marriage lasting the tests of time I hope you will take these keys to making your marriage last to heart.
1. Take Your Wedding Vows To Heart. Plenty of married folks said I Do with their mouth, but never meant it in their heart. Listen, when I said I do over 20 years ago I meant it then and I mean it now. For better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, and as long as we both shall live. People who really mean it when they SAY I DO, don’t look for a way out, but always look for a way through the adversity before them.
2. Guard Your Marriage. Too many married folks do nothing to protect their marriage. One, make sure you make time for each other. Distance for any marriage will take its toll. Don’t work all the time. Don’t let everything revolve around the kids. Don’t put hanging out with your friends before hanging out with your spouse. Set healthy boundaries that position your marriage to grow. In my house, outside of my relationship with God my marriage is top priority. I have to guard our time and guide our direction towards healthy ground.
3. Quit Following The Crowd. If you follow the average couple, you will end up in divorce court. Most couples chase the American dream, but are headed for the American Nightmare. If you don’t want to end up just another marriage statistic then don’t follow patterns that have proven not to work. Build your marriage on Godly principles, healthy processes, and patterns set by those whose marriages have stood the tests of times.
4. Learn How To Communicate. I believe couples when they say “we love it each other, but we just can’t find a way to work things out.” What they really mean is we don’t know how to communicate with each other. Here are things that will help this. One, seek to understand more than to be understood. Don’t worry about proving your point more than working out the relationship. Two, shut up and listen. Many times it’s not that we can’t understand each other, but we don’t care enough to listen. Three, don’t allow things to just build up inside. Daily discuss things together and make big decisions together. Bottom line, you must form a partnership based on love, trust, and devotion. You must learn how to talk through your differences and operate on the same page.
5. Put God First. Too many people put their faith life last. But, later when life falls apart they find themselves running back to what should have been first all along. LISTEN TO ME, don’t wait another minute or for your spouse to make things right with God. You need to get on your knees, seek God’s ways, and ask God to help you be the person that only Christ can help you to be. Otherwise, expect your marriage to struggle and don’t be surprised when your marriage doesn’t last.
(Matthew 7:24-27)“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”
*For those reading this who have experienced a divorce I pray you might find healing. Also, I pray that you will allow God to use your experiences to help others who might be headed this same direction. God Bless!